Redefining kindness in the art of lawyering
Sounds easy enough. Have you been kind to your brothers and sisters in the law? Also, kindness not just to the world at large but to yourself as well?
We lawyers are a special lot (Not to be confused with arrogance). We hold the power to make a difference in the lives of the people we encounter in the course of work and in the world at large.
Every time anyone who is a lawyer, was a lawyer, wants to be a lawyer or tries to be a lawyer, we make the news.
We have the power to make a difference and with that comes a degree of responsibility.
We can change the world. Yes, we can. Do not ever doubt that.
Amidst the doom and gloom of 2025, let us be a better version of ourselves in 2026. Let us make the world feel the positive difference we lawyers can offer.
For a start, let’s go back to being kind.
There is no need to be stoic and aloof. Kindness is not a sign of weakness. Rather it is a sign of foundational strength and resilience which we ought to practice consistently, especially in difficult circumstances.
How do we be kind?
Resist the tyranny of after‑hours emails.
For one, refrain from checking and sending emails after business hours.
This is probably most difficult as we cannot seem to live without our mobile devices.
But surely, being kind to your mind is more important than checking your email constantly. If it is not a matter of life and death, (if it is you should call) what is so important in reading or sending out an email that can wait till the next day.
Perhaps the way practice has evolved is the cause of this.
In the 90s, when faxes were the norm, often, to give grief to opposing parties, one may send a letter by fax on a Friday at 4.45pm and demand a response by the following Monday at 9am.
These days, it is not uncommon to receive emails in the middle of the night and on weekends, some with mindless demands.
It certainly does not help that the courts send out emails after business hours and on weekends as well. Tsk Tsk.
What is the point?
There is nothing to prove. Oh, and lest we forget, there is the scheduled send function, if you wish to send an email at a specific time.
We can be better than that. Let us do a reboot to the system and reclaim our lives and say no to such unhealthy practices.
The second thing is unkind letters.
Do we really need to draft odious contemptuous letters to each other when we can draft simple concise letters on point.
Who are we trying to impress and does getting one over opposing counsel make you happy? Does victory at all costs make you feel good about yourself? If it does, you may want to re-evaluate and ask yourself about the things that matter.
We are an honourable profession. Do you feel any honour when you write such letters?
Thirdly, ungrammatically misguided language.
You do not have to be a wordsmith to write simple effective letters.
There is no need to use words that will send me googling the meaning. What is important is spelling, grammar and not using pleonasm and phrases that include tautology, superfluous words, filler words, and verbosity.
Get it?
In addition, though this may be necessary at times, very often I think it is not. I stand corrected on this.
Is there a need to reserve your client’s rights at the end of every letter? Do you know what rights you are reserving?
Do not hide behind client instructions.
Finally, hiding behind clients’ instructions demonstrates a lack of courage in a serious or contemptible way.
Yes, the client pays you but as lawyers, it is our duty to advise and manage the client.
To illustrate, I once appeared with a learned friend before a district judge in an appeal.
The judge (who has since passed on) told said friend point blank that the appeal was completely devoid of any merit and should be withdrawn to avoid further costs and judicial time.
Outside chambers said friend justified the application because, “she pay so I do”.
Needless to say, the appeal was dismissed with costs.
We act on instructions, but we can also explain manage and advise the client. What is at stake is something money cannot compensate for – your reputation and legacy.
Of course, it is not easy but at the end of the day, our actions do define us.
Finally, finally,
Please do not revert to me as it is simply not possible.
As we begin 2026, let us not forget that we are defined by the choices we make and crucially, only you get to decide what those choices are.
I wish you kindfulness and I leave you with a quote from one of my favourite characters from the 2004 to 2008 series, Boston Legal:
Denny Crane: Alan, you know, one thing you sometimes forget is, no matter how hard your day, no matter how tough your choices, how complex your ethical decisions, you always get to choose what you have for lunch.
Kind regards,
Nicholas Aw
Imperial Law
